Death to Bieber
by LordoftheDickRings
Summary: Dick decides Damian needs to get in touch with modern culture, specifically modern music. No slash unfortunately.


I got the idea for this from a post i seen on tumblr about Damian wanting to assassinate Bieber. Thanks to my wonderful Beta aNGELIC mURDER, i hope you all enjoy!

Disclaimer: i wish i owned the batfamily and DC world but unfortunately i do not Nor do i make any money off it: this is all for fun.

Dick sits behind Bruce's desk in the study. The new numbers from Wayne Industries has just come in and since Tim is with the Titans he is the one with all the paperwork. To help him with his work he has his iPod in the dock blasting one of the most popular songs in modern pop. He is so caught up in his work that he doesn't notice when his side kick and little menace… um brother, enters the room.

"What the hell are you listening to?" Damien inquires, face scrunching up in disgust.

Dick continues to focus on the papers on the desk in front of him, while the younger boy stalks into the room. "Seriously Grayson, What is this crap?"

Dick smiles and doesn't answer, which only serve to infuriate Damian more. Grumbling under his breath he stalks over to where the older man's iPod is playing in the dock. Poking it few times, he reads the artist's name before turning back to his older brother.

"Who the fuck is Justin Bieber?" His nose is turns up in a display of arrogance and Dick has to hold back from laughing.

"Just a popular singer, his music's catchy." To emphasis his point he begins to hum in time with the chorus, flipping through papers to hide the grin he is currently sporting.

_And I'm in pieces, baby fix me_

_And just shake me 'til you wake me from this bad dream_

_I'm goin' down, down, down, down_

_And I just can't believe my first love won't be around_

Dick Grayson is not much of a Justin Bieber fan. In fact, like most of the world, he finds the kid extremely annoying. But he is making it his mission to introduce Damien to popular music amongst the kids his age. And if Damian likes it, then he'd endure the crappy lyrics, and prepubescent vocals. After all it could be worse. He could be listening to artists like 50 Cent and lyrics hating on cops and promoting violence. No, there are worse things than Bieber. Not many, but a few.

So for the remainder of the day, he had left the music on and the volume louder than he normally liked, in hopes that Damian would catch interest in at least a few songs. During the day he finds himself practicing his self-restraint and trying very hard not to destroy his iPod, usually when a Justin song came on, seriously, how do people like him? He rubs his temples, thinking that next time he faces off with the Joker or some other wackjob, maybe he'd play them some of Justin's songs. After a few seconds, they'd probably beg him to return them to Arkham.

When Alfred came to inform him that dinner was ready, he turned it off, grateful for the silence. "Why can't music be as good as it use too. Black Sabath, Metallica, ACDC. Hell even Green Day."

Alfred smiles behind Dick's back, setting the tray on his desk before replying, "I often wonder that myself Master Richard."

At dinner, Damian is more grumpy then usual and seems to be focused on murdering his dinner, answering all of Dick's questions with grunts. Even Tim seems a bit sour. After a few failed attempts he gives up on dinner conversation and focuses instead on his food, pondering why the boys are in such a foul mood.

It is after dinner when he finds out what is really wrong with his younger brothers. It is faint and any normal person wouldn't have noticed, but after years of training with Bruce, all the batfamily has beyond extraordinary hearing, even Alfred. Quietly stepping into the den, he encounters Damian fiddling with one of his weapons on the floor, humming a very familiar, if irritating song. Dick smiles as he recognizes the tune; it had been playing several times during the day. His plan worked out after all.

Hearing a soft laugh, Damian looks up to find a smiling Dick Grayson in the doorway. Dick dismisses the annoyance on the boy's face, and makes his way into over to his sidekick. "Stalk much?" The former assassin sneers.

"No, I was just on my way to the office. Song stuck in your head?"

"No" but the answer is given too quickly and both know it is a lie. Grabbing the weapons he, he stormed past Dick on his way to his room.

"We're good guys, the world needs saved. Everyone will be thankful if I take out that Bieber boy..."

Dick clutches his side as he laughs, watching Damian storm down the halls, plotting the pop idols death. For once he is glad a plan failed and he was half sure that Damian is joking and wouldn't go after Bieber...Then again. He starts after his brother, making a quick stop to inform Alfred not to worry if he can't find them.

END


End file.
